Today, I'm writing about Relationship with Future. I have a really rosy relationship with my future-- after years of struggling with dread as a teenager, I can pretty much say that I'm an optimist. I mean, I struggle with the occasional worry about something happening to Adam or my kids, but as far as "five-year-plan" future goes, it looks good to me.

Adam is in grad school and money has been tight for all of our marriage. Fortunately, we went into marriage with the expectation that it would be. Now he's in the last summer of school and we're approaching another expectation of mine: he will finish and get a job with a good salary. An "I went to school for 6+ years for this" salary.

I'm not very worried about this not happening, to be honest. I can't imagine anyone not wanting to hire Adam-- he's so smart and hardworking. More than that, I just trust that God has a good job for Adam.

I won't lie. I'm looking forward to times I assume are in our future. I'm looking forward to being able to spend $10 without it being a big deal. And therein lies the problem.

I've realized that I fall into the trap of looking forward to the future with hope for the wrong reasons. Because, I assume, money won't be as tight, I'll be even happier, less stressed, less tempted to reside in worry. And before I know what I'm doing, I've envisioned this future where I'm leaving Target after a spur-of-the-moment shopping spree and I'm somehow a more disciplined, patient, contented, loving person.

But it won't happen that way. I have the potential to be those things, but only if I'm willing to learn how to be them now-- and having more money and a larger budget won't make them happen.

If I develop a habit of stress now, I will be stressed later. If I wait until I have a bigger house to be disciplined to clean it, I will have a filthy house-- now and later.

On the other hand, if I learn to be content and refuse to dwell in stress, I will be more Christ-like now. If Adam makes more money, I will be more generous with it, rather than treating it like my security.

We have a home now. We have never gone hungry. We do not have a single need that Christ has ever failed to meet. My future is secure because it rests in Him, not because of a larger budget. The budget isn't a guarantee, but Christ is. I have a longing in my heart for the future, but I must train my eyes and heart to focus properly-- on Heaven with Jesus. That is a hope that is not misplaced.

What about you? Do you dread the future? Do you hope for it? Do you fall into the trap of thinking that if you can just get "there," in another year or two, everything will be better?



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This is part of a two week series on Biblical Relationships that I'm doing with a network of bloggers! Check out their daily (or almost-daily!) posts on Biblical Relationships at these links!